4.
Plodding along in a dark tunnel, there was no noise at all among the 16 strong team, except for the sound of their footsteps. And Hopigan’s hopping. The mood was affecting them all.
Bean Boy was leading them towards whatever was awaiting them. They had only been told by Lame Name Eric that something strange was happening in this tunnel. As they had entered the tunnel they had encountered a couple entertaining each other. As Poo Cake Woman joked that this was probably the strange thing that Lame Name Eric was talking about, they heard a train enter the tunnel at the opposite end, the couple pressed themselves as close to the wall as possible as the train went past.
They were now nearing the half way mark of the tunnel and hadn’t found anything strange just as Fred said “What’s that faint blue light up there?”. They all prepared themselves with their weapons and, with Bean Cake Kid, Fuirell, Stiltzpig, the vampire, the 2 frogs and Brian following behind them as they had finished their training course, they carried on towards the light near the end of the tunnel.
As they got nearer they saw that the faint blue light appeared to be a ghost. Still leading the group, Bean Boy turned around and said “I can handle this one on my own”. Poo Cake Woman said “I hope it gets you” to which Bean Boy replied “Thanks” and carried on.
Having easily ridded the ghost in the tunnel, they had started to wonder back along the tunnel to their vehicles to return to their base.
The journey back was just as silent between everyone as it had been in the tunnel. Once back at the base, Bean Cake Kid, Fuirell, Stiltzpig, the vampire, the frogs and Brian had gone off to find something to do, all the others went off into the communal room. Before arriving there Poo Cake Woman took a door into a different room. Bean Boy was last to exit the vehicle and didn’t follow the others.
Upon entering the communal room 5 doors away, all of the others sat down and as he went to get a bone to eat, Fred said “Its getting worse” to mumbled agreement from everyone.
Bean Cake Kid had gone to find Bean Boy. Finding him sitting on the ledge overhanging the long drop to the floor he sat on the floor near to the ledge. Bean Boy acknowledged that he was there and then continued to stare into space. Bean Cake Kid broke the silence by saying “How long has it been?”.
Bean Boy said “4 years. Me and The Bored Guy were the original two. We met in college. We first started to be friends in one of our lessons when our teacher asked us to draw something. We both drew something really unusual, things that weren’t related to the subject. Weren’t really related to anything.”
“We started hanging out more and our friendship went up a notch when we realized how much we had in common. We had quite an eventful time, being picked on by younger people than us, which we found quite funny.”
“We were eventually joined by Poo Cake Woman, who actually lived quite far away from us. Before her it was just two high school friends hanging out making a joke out of everything. But she introduced us to more and more people.”
“I was sitting on her bed one day, when Poo Cake Woman introduced me to Fred, the Lonely Bear and Eric The Phantom, who later went on to get named Lame Name Eric after something The Bored Guy said”.
“We all became good friends and started to help out people in trouble when we found them. It stayed this way for 2 and half years, with all 6 of us, until The Bored Guy said he had to go away for a bit.”
“He said that when he returned we would be able to call on him if we needed it. He left the day after and we were down to 5 of us. We set about looking for new members, but weren’t successful. 9 months later we heard from The Bored Guy who said he was coming home soon.”
“We stayed in contact with him and learnt about things he had, and first saw our old friend again after 10 months, when we needed him to help us out with his new flying car he had told us about.”
“He soon returned and was somewhat more successful finding new members than we had been. He helped us find out most of the new members, starting with MM, who he had said he met when he was away. Whilst MM just seemed like a normal person, we all got on with him and decided that he should stay.”
“You came about at a similar time to when we found Hopigan and the 62 fingered man. Your name, obviously came from combining your two founders, me and Poo Cake Woman. We thought that Hopigan was unusual like the rest of us, so we invited him in. Lame Name Eric wanted the 62 fingered man as he said he could be useful for the control side of things”.
“We found Mr Mike .. well .. Mr Mike found us actually. He didn’t seem to know where he was and somehow forced his way into our building, and after that he just kept coming back. Your friend Fuirell, I came across him once on a car journey, I can’t remember the exact details about it, but I liked him so he stayed.”
“Your other friend, Stiltzpig, was also introduced to us by Poo Cake Woman. I’ve never been informed of where he came from, but he’s still here. And obviously you know about the Vampire, Brian, the frog and the newt. Which, as you know, evolved into a frog just the other day. So now we have two frogs.”
Bean Cake Kid was interested as to how they had all met as he had never been told before. He said to Bean Boy “Oh, I thought you had all been friends for much longer than that”.
Bean Boy then finished the conversation by saying “It does seem like it, doesn’t it. Sadly enough, I’m not sure that we are going to continue for much longer ...”
Thursday, 27 March 2008
3.9 backwards cat
3.9
On their way back to the place where they had hidden their vehicles, Hopigan thought that he would just have a quick look inside the Nimlok to see what it was like inside. Having found quite a strange mix of stuff, the others joined him to have a look. It seemed that the Meercat had kidnapped many other things and also planned more evil acts. He had a bomb kept away in one cupboard, a frog, a newt and a vampire in another room, a jet fighter taking up most of the space in the biggest room and something else beginning with the letter R, that none of the group could remember the name of. They decided to leave the bomb, the jet fighter and the something beginning with R, but to take the frog, the newt and the vampire back with them.
As they now had a few more to bring back with them, there wasn’t much space left in any of their vehicles. The Bored Guy had found a trailer, and attached it to the back of one of the vehicles and sat in it, MM found a small tray with wheels on it, and attached it to the back of Bean Cake Kid’s bike, picked up Brian and The Lonely Bear and perched on the tray. By the time they arrived back at the base, they were all exhausted, especially Bean Cake Kid, as he had done a lot of cycling at fast speeds. They arranged some beds for the frog, the newt and the vampire, and all headed to their own rooms for some much needed rest.
The next day, they had decided to continue their training program as usual. Bean Boy, Poo Cake Woman, The Bored Guy, MM, Fred, Hopigan, the Lonely Bear, Lame Name Eric and 62 fingered man entered into the now crowded training room, as they had inducted the frog, the newt, the vampire and Brian into it, to join the already existing trainees, Stiltzpig, who scuttles around all the time, and likes to play ping pong with his nose, extending his flat tail out of him bum to use as a bat, Fuirell, who was the result of a frog mated with a squirrel and Bean Cake Kid, who, despite trying to persuade Bean Boy otherwise, was still in his training process.
They were busy doing their usual teaching method when Stiltzpig said “Are we allowed to know what happened yesterday?”. After some thought, the experienced team explained to the young ones everything that had happened, and when they were finished, Stiltzpig and Fuirell were amazed. Fuirell said quietly, with much awe in his tone, “Your all a bunch of heroes”. Stiltzpig looked equally as impressed and said “And Mr Mike saved the day”. Bean Boy, at this point, said to the young ones with much to learn, “Sometimes, even the most retarded people have moments of genius. He must have inherited something from his parents after all”. Not having known who Mr Mike’s parents were, Bean Cake Kid asked. Bean Boy’s reply was, “His parents, were none other, than Superman and Wonderwoman ..”
Later that night, the usual team of heroes, and the new comers, all went to sleep happy with the knowledge that they had been a part of ridding the world of another bad guy. Mr Mike also went to sleep with a new way of thinking of life, now believing that everything happens for a reason.
On their way back to the place where they had hidden their vehicles, Hopigan thought that he would just have a quick look inside the Nimlok to see what it was like inside. Having found quite a strange mix of stuff, the others joined him to have a look. It seemed that the Meercat had kidnapped many other things and also planned more evil acts. He had a bomb kept away in one cupboard, a frog, a newt and a vampire in another room, a jet fighter taking up most of the space in the biggest room and something else beginning with the letter R, that none of the group could remember the name of. They decided to leave the bomb, the jet fighter and the something beginning with R, but to take the frog, the newt and the vampire back with them.
As they now had a few more to bring back with them, there wasn’t much space left in any of their vehicles. The Bored Guy had found a trailer, and attached it to the back of one of the vehicles and sat in it, MM found a small tray with wheels on it, and attached it to the back of Bean Cake Kid’s bike, picked up Brian and The Lonely Bear and perched on the tray. By the time they arrived back at the base, they were all exhausted, especially Bean Cake Kid, as he had done a lot of cycling at fast speeds. They arranged some beds for the frog, the newt and the vampire, and all headed to their own rooms for some much needed rest.
The next day, they had decided to continue their training program as usual. Bean Boy, Poo Cake Woman, The Bored Guy, MM, Fred, Hopigan, the Lonely Bear, Lame Name Eric and 62 fingered man entered into the now crowded training room, as they had inducted the frog, the newt, the vampire and Brian into it, to join the already existing trainees, Stiltzpig, who scuttles around all the time, and likes to play ping pong with his nose, extending his flat tail out of him bum to use as a bat, Fuirell, who was the result of a frog mated with a squirrel and Bean Cake Kid, who, despite trying to persuade Bean Boy otherwise, was still in his training process.
They were busy doing their usual teaching method when Stiltzpig said “Are we allowed to know what happened yesterday?”. After some thought, the experienced team explained to the young ones everything that had happened, and when they were finished, Stiltzpig and Fuirell were amazed. Fuirell said quietly, with much awe in his tone, “Your all a bunch of heroes”. Stiltzpig looked equally as impressed and said “And Mr Mike saved the day”. Bean Boy, at this point, said to the young ones with much to learn, “Sometimes, even the most retarded people have moments of genius. He must have inherited something from his parents after all”. Not having known who Mr Mike’s parents were, Bean Cake Kid asked. Bean Boy’s reply was, “His parents, were none other, than Superman and Wonderwoman ..”
Later that night, the usual team of heroes, and the new comers, all went to sleep happy with the knowledge that they had been a part of ridding the world of another bad guy. Mr Mike also went to sleep with a new way of thinking of life, now believing that everything happens for a reason.
3.8 backwards cat
3.8
Mr Mike was fed up with this place and wanted to get out. He voiced his thoughts to Brian, and Brian laughed and said that there was no way out. Mr Mike explained that there must be a way out, as there must be a way in, or how else would he have got here. Brian considered this and said "I suppose we might as well look for somewhere now, as you have doomed us all to something bad". They got up, Mr Mike giving Brian some help, as he was still in pain after having been smacked into the wall, and started going around the strange place they were in, which was distinctly different from what it had been not long ago. Travelling around the whole area, they found nothing that looked like it would be of any help to them to get out, they checked the items that had been left behind and they looked far away into the distance of this apparently never ending world for any sign of an exit. They made it back to where they began and slumped against the wall again. Brian said “See, I told you that there was no way out”. Mr Mike suddenly had a brainwave, possibly the only brainwave he had ever encountered, and quickly asked Brian if he had seen any glass around in this place.
Bean Boy jumped off the bike and quickly ran towards Poo Cake Woman and got her out of the Spiometer before the Meercat had even got close to them. Returning to Bean Cake Kid’s bike, Bean Boy and a rather shaken up Poo Cake Woman struggled to fit onto it, as it was just a bike designed for one person. Luckily MM had picked up some energy bones for Fred, and, seeing the problem, threw it towards his four legged friend. Before it had started its downward descent through the air, Fred leapt up and ate the whole thing in one, then whizzed past the slightly baffled Meercat and stood still whilst Bean Boy helped Poo Cake Woman onto his back. Bean Boy then jumped back onto the bike and they both joined the other members of their team, trapping the Meercat and his penny farthing between them and the Spiometer. The Meercat however remained slightly positive and said “You may have rescued her, but you still have not defeated me”.
Mr Mike was happy to know that his brainwave had been a successful idea, as he found himself and Brian, when they had gone through the window, had returned to the same street that Mr Mike had disappeared from earlier. He looked around, and saw a very strange looking large device that had a chair in the middle surrounded by some very large spikes. He was curious as to what it was, and decided to investigate it. Slowly walking towards it, Mr Mike and his new friend Brian were overcome by how big this thing actually was. It towered above them and the spikes were much bigger than they had first seemed. Hearing noises, Mr Mike signaled to Brian that they should be quiet, and started to creep around the side of whatever this unknown thing was. When he got to a point where he could see some more, he was surprised to see that his friends were all gathered a short distance away. Circling around a bit further he saw what appeared to be a meercat standing next to a penny farthing. He stayed where he was, silent and still for about 30 seconds, all the while the feeling that something wasn’t quite right grew inside of him. He took out one of his spanners, and launched it at the meercat.
Before they knew what had happened, the Meercat was lying on the floor, not moving. The team cautiously closed in on Poo Cake Woman’s kidnapper, until they were so close to him that they saw a large lump had formed on his head. The Bored Guy thought he noticed something shiny on the floor underneath the Meercat, and moved the body out of the way, for all of the team to see a spanner sitting on the floor. They all turned around in unison, to see Mr Mike walking towards them from behind the Spiometer. Poo Cake Woman, speaking for the first time since they had rescued her, said “How did you know he was the bad guy?” to which Mr Mike shrugged and said “Can we go back to our base now?”. Having got used to his retardedness a long time ago, none of the team bothered to pursue the subject any further.
Mr Mike was fed up with this place and wanted to get out. He voiced his thoughts to Brian, and Brian laughed and said that there was no way out. Mr Mike explained that there must be a way out, as there must be a way in, or how else would he have got here. Brian considered this and said "I suppose we might as well look for somewhere now, as you have doomed us all to something bad". They got up, Mr Mike giving Brian some help, as he was still in pain after having been smacked into the wall, and started going around the strange place they were in, which was distinctly different from what it had been not long ago. Travelling around the whole area, they found nothing that looked like it would be of any help to them to get out, they checked the items that had been left behind and they looked far away into the distance of this apparently never ending world for any sign of an exit. They made it back to where they began and slumped against the wall again. Brian said “See, I told you that there was no way out”. Mr Mike suddenly had a brainwave, possibly the only brainwave he had ever encountered, and quickly asked Brian if he had seen any glass around in this place.
Bean Boy jumped off the bike and quickly ran towards Poo Cake Woman and got her out of the Spiometer before the Meercat had even got close to them. Returning to Bean Cake Kid’s bike, Bean Boy and a rather shaken up Poo Cake Woman struggled to fit onto it, as it was just a bike designed for one person. Luckily MM had picked up some energy bones for Fred, and, seeing the problem, threw it towards his four legged friend. Before it had started its downward descent through the air, Fred leapt up and ate the whole thing in one, then whizzed past the slightly baffled Meercat and stood still whilst Bean Boy helped Poo Cake Woman onto his back. Bean Boy then jumped back onto the bike and they both joined the other members of their team, trapping the Meercat and his penny farthing between them and the Spiometer. The Meercat however remained slightly positive and said “You may have rescued her, but you still have not defeated me”.
Mr Mike was happy to know that his brainwave had been a successful idea, as he found himself and Brian, when they had gone through the window, had returned to the same street that Mr Mike had disappeared from earlier. He looked around, and saw a very strange looking large device that had a chair in the middle surrounded by some very large spikes. He was curious as to what it was, and decided to investigate it. Slowly walking towards it, Mr Mike and his new friend Brian were overcome by how big this thing actually was. It towered above them and the spikes were much bigger than they had first seemed. Hearing noises, Mr Mike signaled to Brian that they should be quiet, and started to creep around the side of whatever this unknown thing was. When he got to a point where he could see some more, he was surprised to see that his friends were all gathered a short distance away. Circling around a bit further he saw what appeared to be a meercat standing next to a penny farthing. He stayed where he was, silent and still for about 30 seconds, all the while the feeling that something wasn’t quite right grew inside of him. He took out one of his spanners, and launched it at the meercat.
Before they knew what had happened, the Meercat was lying on the floor, not moving. The team cautiously closed in on Poo Cake Woman’s kidnapper, until they were so close to him that they saw a large lump had formed on his head. The Bored Guy thought he noticed something shiny on the floor underneath the Meercat, and moved the body out of the way, for all of the team to see a spanner sitting on the floor. They all turned around in unison, to see Mr Mike walking towards them from behind the Spiometer. Poo Cake Woman, speaking for the first time since they had rescued her, said “How did you know he was the bad guy?” to which Mr Mike shrugged and said “Can we go back to our base now?”. Having got used to his retardedness a long time ago, none of the team bothered to pursue the subject any further.
3.7 backwards cat
3.7
Circling around the so called Nimlok, they were looking for a possible entrance. Having gone all the way round to the opposite side, The Ball called for Hopigan when he saw a door a long way up the side. Hopigan started bouncing as high as he could and eventually was level with the door. On his next bounce, he stretched out a hand, and knocked on the door, before making his journey back towards the ground, where he managed to stop his bouncing instantly. After about 15 seconds, the door opened and a meercat poked its head out and looked down at the group gathered around the bottom of his spherical hideout. The meercat laughed and said, in a high pitched squeaky voice, “I wondered when you might be here to rescue your Pooey Cakey Woman or whatever she is called. I’ll tell you what, if you can beat me in racing to her over there, on that spiometer, I might think about letting you have her back, but I don’t see that you will be able to beat me”. At this point, Bean Boy gave a subtle look to Bean Cake Kid that suggested that he was going to rescue her.
Feeling sorry for Brian, Mr Mike knelt down towards him and said "But I helped you out, you were stuck in and endless cycle of events that had no real meaning ... ". Brian managed to get up onto his feet and replied back to Mr Mike, "You didn't help us out at all! We were all quite happy doing what we needed to do to keep everyone going. Now you've ruined that and completely ruined the whole system". Mr Mike tried explaining to Brian that what was happening here didn't need to happen and it could not have any effect on anything. He told him that it was just a random load of events all somehow connected in obscure ways. Brian countered this argument with "But we were told we had to keep doing those specific things, otherwise something bad would happen". Mr Mike asked Brian who had told him this, and Brian said "I don’t know, he wouldn't let me or any of the others see him, and some of the sentences he spoke .. didn't really make sense".
Before they had a proper chance to prepare, the meercat had said "The race begins NOW" and jumped on his penny farthing and was off on his way towards Poo Cake Woman. Bean Boy reacted instantly by jumping on the back of Bean Cake Kid's bike and telling him to get a move on. Bean Cake Kid was fast on his bike when not using much energy, but when he was really going for it, traveled exceptionally quickly, therefore had no problem in catching up and overtaking the meercat, even with the added weight of Bean Boy on his bike.
Circling around the so called Nimlok, they were looking for a possible entrance. Having gone all the way round to the opposite side, The Ball called for Hopigan when he saw a door a long way up the side. Hopigan started bouncing as high as he could and eventually was level with the door. On his next bounce, he stretched out a hand, and knocked on the door, before making his journey back towards the ground, where he managed to stop his bouncing instantly. After about 15 seconds, the door opened and a meercat poked its head out and looked down at the group gathered around the bottom of his spherical hideout. The meercat laughed and said, in a high pitched squeaky voice, “I wondered when you might be here to rescue your Pooey Cakey Woman or whatever she is called. I’ll tell you what, if you can beat me in racing to her over there, on that spiometer, I might think about letting you have her back, but I don’t see that you will be able to beat me”. At this point, Bean Boy gave a subtle look to Bean Cake Kid that suggested that he was going to rescue her.
Feeling sorry for Brian, Mr Mike knelt down towards him and said "But I helped you out, you were stuck in and endless cycle of events that had no real meaning ... ". Brian managed to get up onto his feet and replied back to Mr Mike, "You didn't help us out at all! We were all quite happy doing what we needed to do to keep everyone going. Now you've ruined that and completely ruined the whole system". Mr Mike tried explaining to Brian that what was happening here didn't need to happen and it could not have any effect on anything. He told him that it was just a random load of events all somehow connected in obscure ways. Brian countered this argument with "But we were told we had to keep doing those specific things, otherwise something bad would happen". Mr Mike asked Brian who had told him this, and Brian said "I don’t know, he wouldn't let me or any of the others see him, and some of the sentences he spoke .. didn't really make sense".
Before they had a proper chance to prepare, the meercat had said "The race begins NOW" and jumped on his penny farthing and was off on his way towards Poo Cake Woman. Bean Boy reacted instantly by jumping on the back of Bean Cake Kid's bike and telling him to get a move on. Bean Cake Kid was fast on his bike when not using much energy, but when he was really going for it, traveled exceptionally quickly, therefore had no problem in catching up and overtaking the meercat, even with the added weight of Bean Boy on his bike.
3.6 backwards cat
3.6
Not quite sure he believed that Mr Mike didn’t know where he was from, the Backwards Man sighed and shuffled around one of the aisles of his shop. Watching him, Mr Mike saw the Backwards Man disappear through a doorway. Slowly following him, Mr Mike, entered the room to see yet another strange sight. It appeared that the backwards individual was trying to fly, by flapping his hands by his side, but quite clearly not getting anywhere. When he noticed that he was being watched, the Backwards Man asked Mr Mike if he had ever played on a Poo before. As he was looking a bit puzzled, the Backwards Man gathered that Mr Mike had no idea what he was talking about and proceeded to explain to him the novelty interaction of Poo.
Following Lonely Bear’s small pointing finger, they all turned round to see a large white ball looming over them with the word “Nimlok” right across the middle of it. Quickly getting over the surprise of having stood right in front of what they were looking for, the team set about looking for clues as to what this Nimlok thing was, or what might be inside it.
Having been overloaded with to much information that was confusing for even an ordinary person, let alone Mr Mike, he left the Pohs and went down into the lift before the Backwards Man had bothered to come away from his game. Swimming through the air in the direction of the random events, Mr Mike was irritated. He arrived next to Knifey and instantly saw the nail heading towards his back, knowing that when this happened, the sharp objects would be dropped on the Fog People. He didn’t understand why this was supposed to happen, so whipped out one of his spanners, and chucked it as hard as he could at Knifey. The sound of the collision with Knifey Man’s head was horrible, and, not having reached the road wall yet, he toppled out of sight. Several seconds later, the giant nail was hit by Gshnm, but as its usual target wasn’t there, Gshnm moved towards the wall himself. This resulted in Teethy not being able to hit his target, Sakesimen, and as the toothbrush followed him, there was nothing to stop the TV that was thrown by Roger. The TV continued to go downwards, and landed on the 3 people with no names. This caused Roger to become very angry. Roger turned on Uck and pushes him very far away, quite quickly. This then eliminated the need for Brian to be holding the umbrella, and, when he noticed that there was nothing dripping onto it, stopped running to see what had happened. As the upside down unicyclist didn’t yet know what was going on, he carried on cycling, which flung Brian off the wheel and into the wall, against which Mr Mike was hiding, as he had seen that he had done something wrong. Despite being in serious pain, Brian managed to lift his head up, look towards Mr Mike, and say “Damn you humans!” whilst shaking his fist in Mr Mike’s direction.
Not quite sure he believed that Mr Mike didn’t know where he was from, the Backwards Man sighed and shuffled around one of the aisles of his shop. Watching him, Mr Mike saw the Backwards Man disappear through a doorway. Slowly following him, Mr Mike, entered the room to see yet another strange sight. It appeared that the backwards individual was trying to fly, by flapping his hands by his side, but quite clearly not getting anywhere. When he noticed that he was being watched, the Backwards Man asked Mr Mike if he had ever played on a Poo before. As he was looking a bit puzzled, the Backwards Man gathered that Mr Mike had no idea what he was talking about and proceeded to explain to him the novelty interaction of Poo.
Following Lonely Bear’s small pointing finger, they all turned round to see a large white ball looming over them with the word “Nimlok” right across the middle of it. Quickly getting over the surprise of having stood right in front of what they were looking for, the team set about looking for clues as to what this Nimlok thing was, or what might be inside it.
Having been overloaded with to much information that was confusing for even an ordinary person, let alone Mr Mike, he left the Pohs and went down into the lift before the Backwards Man had bothered to come away from his game. Swimming through the air in the direction of the random events, Mr Mike was irritated. He arrived next to Knifey and instantly saw the nail heading towards his back, knowing that when this happened, the sharp objects would be dropped on the Fog People. He didn’t understand why this was supposed to happen, so whipped out one of his spanners, and chucked it as hard as he could at Knifey. The sound of the collision with Knifey Man’s head was horrible, and, not having reached the road wall yet, he toppled out of sight. Several seconds later, the giant nail was hit by Gshnm, but as its usual target wasn’t there, Gshnm moved towards the wall himself. This resulted in Teethy not being able to hit his target, Sakesimen, and as the toothbrush followed him, there was nothing to stop the TV that was thrown by Roger. The TV continued to go downwards, and landed on the 3 people with no names. This caused Roger to become very angry. Roger turned on Uck and pushes him very far away, quite quickly. This then eliminated the need for Brian to be holding the umbrella, and, when he noticed that there was nothing dripping onto it, stopped running to see what had happened. As the upside down unicyclist didn’t yet know what was going on, he carried on cycling, which flung Brian off the wheel and into the wall, against which Mr Mike was hiding, as he had seen that he had done something wrong. Despite being in serious pain, Brian managed to lift his head up, look towards Mr Mike, and say “Damn you humans!” whilst shaking his fist in Mr Mike’s direction.
3.5 backwards cat
3.5
Having returned to the Pohs, Mr Mike was curious as to why all that stuff was happening. He asked the Backwards Man "What are the purpose of those events?", to which he got the reply "I'm not sure, but its something to do with him over there in that house, all the beings you have just seen don’t seem to be able to stop what they are doing". Even though he was retarded, Mr Mike had enough sense to say "But they are hurting themselves and each other ..."
Having suggested that they split up into groups of two to search for the Nimlok, The Ball was currently rolling alongside Bean Cake Kid whilst keeping a look out. Hopigan had gone with Bean Boy, Lonely Bear riding on Fred's back and The Bored Guy with MM. After about 15 minutes, they had still got nowhere, and they were all starting to get a bit worried.
The Backwards Man said that only he knew how to get up to the other house, he was the only one that ever would, and no one else was allowed to go up there. He also explained that he had only been up there twice and only has contact with the person that lived there once every month when he came into the pohs for food. The attention then switched to Mr Mike, as the Backwards Man asked where he was from. Being more retarded than a parrot with a monkey’s torso dressed in a clown outfit and speaks a strange form of German slang, Mr Mike genuinely didn’t know.
After searching around the whole of Thirsty Land, The Ball and Bean Cake Kid, Hopigan and Bean Boy and The Bored Guy and MM all came to the same point at a T junction at the same time. Having assumed that none of them had been successful in their search, they didn’t say a word to each other. The silence was broken by Fred’s barking at which point they saw him trotting towards them. When they reached the others, Lonely Bear, still on Fred’s back, said “You could of told us you’d found the Nimlok”.
Having returned to the Pohs, Mr Mike was curious as to why all that stuff was happening. He asked the Backwards Man "What are the purpose of those events?", to which he got the reply "I'm not sure, but its something to do with him over there in that house, all the beings you have just seen don’t seem to be able to stop what they are doing". Even though he was retarded, Mr Mike had enough sense to say "But they are hurting themselves and each other ..."
Having suggested that they split up into groups of two to search for the Nimlok, The Ball was currently rolling alongside Bean Cake Kid whilst keeping a look out. Hopigan had gone with Bean Boy, Lonely Bear riding on Fred's back and The Bored Guy with MM. After about 15 minutes, they had still got nowhere, and they were all starting to get a bit worried.
The Backwards Man said that only he knew how to get up to the other house, he was the only one that ever would, and no one else was allowed to go up there. He also explained that he had only been up there twice and only has contact with the person that lived there once every month when he came into the pohs for food. The attention then switched to Mr Mike, as the Backwards Man asked where he was from. Being more retarded than a parrot with a monkey’s torso dressed in a clown outfit and speaks a strange form of German slang, Mr Mike genuinely didn’t know.
After searching around the whole of Thirsty Land, The Ball and Bean Cake Kid, Hopigan and Bean Boy and The Bored Guy and MM all came to the same point at a T junction at the same time. Having assumed that none of them had been successful in their search, they didn’t say a word to each other. The silence was broken by Fred’s barking at which point they saw him trotting towards them. When they reached the others, Lonely Bear, still on Fred’s back, said “You could of told us you’d found the Nimlok”.
3.4 backwards cat
3.4
"I'll start off here, with the road wall. It is quite self explanatory why it is called the road wall, as it has a road painted on it. If you watch carefully, you will see a person walking down it, and when they reach the end of the road, they will be shot. On this side of the wall, in about 7.224 seconds we will see the Knifey Man run into it and stay there. The other two sides of this wall are just blank. After a few seconds Gshnm, the giant square headed nail man, will hammer a nail into Knifey's back which will cause him to drop knives onto the fog people down there, who will, if provoked, cloud you in fog and attack you at the knees. If you follow me over in this direction, we will see 3 people who have no names, one of which has cut his fingers off and tied them onto his hat. His eyes have also lost connection with his eye sockets, so one of the others is holding them up, so that he can see himself. Moving on again, there is Teethy, who is standing on Gshnm's head and is obsessed with toothpaste and toothbrushes. He has been trying to shoot the man over there, who I call Sakesimen, with his toothpaste. Sakesimen is stuck in an endless loop of typing the word "page" over and over again on his computer, as punishment for being a nerd. Teethy has a giant toothbrush floating above his head, which is not just because of his obsession, it is also stopping that TV from hitting him. The TV is being thrown at Teethy by Roger, who feels the need to hurt someone because he himself is trapped in a noose. A short detour up here will bring us to the Heamise, who are two different people joint at the head, and next to them is the equally deranged man with the rest of his body coming out of the top of his head. He is so unhappy with his situation that he has taken up smoking, and never has less than 7 cigarettes in his mouth at one time, sometimes more than 7. Further on from him, is a small mountain which has a skiing yeti on it. Returning back to Roger, he is being held in a noose by this man, who, the one time he spoke, said that his name was Uck. For some reason, Uck is bleeding from his eyelid, and, judging by this thought bubble, is thinking of absolutely nothing every time I see him. The blood from Uck's eyelid is dripping down this way towards Brian, who is avoiding a bloody shower by using an umbrella. Over there in the distance, the last thing that has nothing to do with anything else, is a man who blinks every 5 seconds whilst standing next to something resembling the 182 bus which isn't moving anywhere. Brian however is moving somewhere, as he is stuck on the wheel of an upside down unicycle and must keep running to prevent himself from falling off. The rider of the upside down unicycle is also upside down, and we find ourselves back where we began, as the unicyclist is doing a handstand on the road wall"
As they could get no closer to Thirsty Land by car, the peculiar group of friends had hidden their vehicles and were continuing on foot. Or, in Hopigan's case, hopping, in The Ball's case, rolling and Bean Cake Kid was still on his bike, but now going at a normal pace. Staying in touch with the control team, they had been told that they should look for a Nimlok, as this was where Poo Cake Woman's beepamathon was saying she was. However none of them were quite sure what a Nimlok was.
"I'll start off here, with the road wall. It is quite self explanatory why it is called the road wall, as it has a road painted on it. If you watch carefully, you will see a person walking down it, and when they reach the end of the road, they will be shot. On this side of the wall, in about 7.224 seconds we will see the Knifey Man run into it and stay there. The other two sides of this wall are just blank. After a few seconds Gshnm, the giant square headed nail man, will hammer a nail into Knifey's back which will cause him to drop knives onto the fog people down there, who will, if provoked, cloud you in fog and attack you at the knees. If you follow me over in this direction, we will see 3 people who have no names, one of which has cut his fingers off and tied them onto his hat. His eyes have also lost connection with his eye sockets, so one of the others is holding them up, so that he can see himself. Moving on again, there is Teethy, who is standing on Gshnm's head and is obsessed with toothpaste and toothbrushes. He has been trying to shoot the man over there, who I call Sakesimen, with his toothpaste. Sakesimen is stuck in an endless loop of typing the word "page" over and over again on his computer, as punishment for being a nerd. Teethy has a giant toothbrush floating above his head, which is not just because of his obsession, it is also stopping that TV from hitting him. The TV is being thrown at Teethy by Roger, who feels the need to hurt someone because he himself is trapped in a noose. A short detour up here will bring us to the Heamise, who are two different people joint at the head, and next to them is the equally deranged man with the rest of his body coming out of the top of his head. He is so unhappy with his situation that he has taken up smoking, and never has less than 7 cigarettes in his mouth at one time, sometimes more than 7. Further on from him, is a small mountain which has a skiing yeti on it. Returning back to Roger, he is being held in a noose by this man, who, the one time he spoke, said that his name was Uck. For some reason, Uck is bleeding from his eyelid, and, judging by this thought bubble, is thinking of absolutely nothing every time I see him. The blood from Uck's eyelid is dripping down this way towards Brian, who is avoiding a bloody shower by using an umbrella. Over there in the distance, the last thing that has nothing to do with anything else, is a man who blinks every 5 seconds whilst standing next to something resembling the 182 bus which isn't moving anywhere. Brian however is moving somewhere, as he is stuck on the wheel of an upside down unicycle and must keep running to prevent himself from falling off. The rider of the upside down unicycle is also upside down, and we find ourselves back where we began, as the unicyclist is doing a handstand on the road wall"
As they could get no closer to Thirsty Land by car, the peculiar group of friends had hidden their vehicles and were continuing on foot. Or, in Hopigan's case, hopping, in The Ball's case, rolling and Bean Cake Kid was still on his bike, but now going at a normal pace. Staying in touch with the control team, they had been told that they should look for a Nimlok, as this was where Poo Cake Woman's beepamathon was saying she was. However none of them were quite sure what a Nimlok was.
3.3 backwards cat
3.3
When Bean Boy entered the circular room, he found Bean Cake Kid stationary on his bike. Bean Boy quickly told him what was happening and went to leave the room when Bean Cake Kid said "Can't I help?” Bean Boy said "No sorry you can't, you don’t have any specific power that will help us". Bean Cake Kid said "Watch this then" and set off on his bike. He went for about 10metres at normal speed on his bike, and then something happened, and Bean Boy was astounded that a few seconds ago, Bean Cake Kid had been riding his bike normally and now was going so fast he appeared as a blur going round and round Bean Boy. Bean Boy shouted for Bean Cake Kid to stop and when he did, said "Ok, you can come with us".
Whilst sitting at a backwards table, Mr Mike was having it explained to him that for some reason this part of the world he was in was completely backwards, and there were only 2 beings that lived here, the shop owner and the man who lived in the house on the other ledge. Being curious, Mr Mike asked where exactly this place was. The Backwards Man stated that he didn’t know, as he had never been out of it and that the only place that he could travel to was the area where he had almost been hit by a spanner, which had been out of the ordinary for him, which is what made him stick around, which in turn, led him to meet Mr Mike.
They all gathered in the garage, after having started up their own individual engines. Fred, the Lonely Bear, The Bored Guy, The Ball, Hopigan and MM were all wondering why Bean Cake Kid was there with his bike. Bean Boy informed them all that Bean Cake Kid was coming with them, and when they all asked why, he simply said “You’ll see”. Setting off on their way they headed in what they thought was the right direction, before the 62 fingered man, who had been joined by Lame Name Eric, and jointly made the control team, could tell them the exact route that they were going. As they were all in cars and would be travelling quite fast, none of them, except Bean Boy, knew how Bean Cake Kid was going to keep up.
The Backwards Man had agreed to Mr Mike’s request to be shown around the strange place again, so they made their way down in the lift and over in the direction that they had come. He eventually saw the wall, behind which the Backwards Man had been hiding, in the distance. When they got to it Mr Mike asked “Where does it all start?” The Backwards Man replied “There is no specific start, its just all happening at the same time” Being surprised at hearing the Backwards Man talk normally, Mr Mike asked him why he was now talking normally and discovered that he didn’t really have a choice, sometimes he spoke backwards and sometimes he spoke normally. Mr Mike then asked if he could explain to him what was going on here.
They were all speeding along quite happily, now knowing where they were heading, when Hopigan asked “So what are we waiting to see?” to which Bean Boy replied “Look to your left”. When they all turned their attention to their left they... didn’t see anything. Bean Boy realised his mistake and said “Sorry, I meant look to your right”. Looking to their right they all saw Bean Cake Kid on his bike cycling alongside them, despite them travelling very fast in their cars he was managing to keep up. Bean Boy informed Bean Cake Kid where they were going as soon as he found out from the control team. As they were nearing Thirsty Land, Bean Cake Kid fell slightly behind them just incase anything unexpected was going to happen.
When Bean Boy entered the circular room, he found Bean Cake Kid stationary on his bike. Bean Boy quickly told him what was happening and went to leave the room when Bean Cake Kid said "Can't I help?” Bean Boy said "No sorry you can't, you don’t have any specific power that will help us". Bean Cake Kid said "Watch this then" and set off on his bike. He went for about 10metres at normal speed on his bike, and then something happened, and Bean Boy was astounded that a few seconds ago, Bean Cake Kid had been riding his bike normally and now was going so fast he appeared as a blur going round and round Bean Boy. Bean Boy shouted for Bean Cake Kid to stop and when he did, said "Ok, you can come with us".
Whilst sitting at a backwards table, Mr Mike was having it explained to him that for some reason this part of the world he was in was completely backwards, and there were only 2 beings that lived here, the shop owner and the man who lived in the house on the other ledge. Being curious, Mr Mike asked where exactly this place was. The Backwards Man stated that he didn’t know, as he had never been out of it and that the only place that he could travel to was the area where he had almost been hit by a spanner, which had been out of the ordinary for him, which is what made him stick around, which in turn, led him to meet Mr Mike.
They all gathered in the garage, after having started up their own individual engines. Fred, the Lonely Bear, The Bored Guy, The Ball, Hopigan and MM were all wondering why Bean Cake Kid was there with his bike. Bean Boy informed them all that Bean Cake Kid was coming with them, and when they all asked why, he simply said “You’ll see”. Setting off on their way they headed in what they thought was the right direction, before the 62 fingered man, who had been joined by Lame Name Eric, and jointly made the control team, could tell them the exact route that they were going. As they were all in cars and would be travelling quite fast, none of them, except Bean Boy, knew how Bean Cake Kid was going to keep up.
The Backwards Man had agreed to Mr Mike’s request to be shown around the strange place again, so they made their way down in the lift and over in the direction that they had come. He eventually saw the wall, behind which the Backwards Man had been hiding, in the distance. When they got to it Mr Mike asked “Where does it all start?” The Backwards Man replied “There is no specific start, its just all happening at the same time” Being surprised at hearing the Backwards Man talk normally, Mr Mike asked him why he was now talking normally and discovered that he didn’t really have a choice, sometimes he spoke backwards and sometimes he spoke normally. Mr Mike then asked if he could explain to him what was going on here.
They were all speeding along quite happily, now knowing where they were heading, when Hopigan asked “So what are we waiting to see?” to which Bean Boy replied “Look to your left”. When they all turned their attention to their left they... didn’t see anything. Bean Boy realised his mistake and said “Sorry, I meant look to your right”. Looking to their right they all saw Bean Cake Kid on his bike cycling alongside them, despite them travelling very fast in their cars he was managing to keep up. Bean Boy informed Bean Cake Kid where they were going as soon as he found out from the control team. As they were nearing Thirsty Land, Bean Cake Kid fell slightly behind them just incase anything unexpected was going to happen.
3.2 backwards cat
3.2
Bean Boy was quite happily sitting on his bed, when 62 fingered man called him using the intercom system that had been made by Lame Name Eric. He had thought it would be funny to make it in the shape of a hole punch, so that when people were using it, they could say "I'm giving you a punch" if they wanted to talk to you. They had all been given different objects to act as intercoms. Poo Cake Woman was given a plastic banana, The Bored Guy an unsolved rubix cube, Fred got a post it note book made out of cat food, so that he didn’t eat it, the Lonely Bear a stuffed pigeon, MM got a bit of wood, Hopigan’s was just an ordinary pair of headphones, so he could place them on his head rather than having to hold something as he needed both of his arms to help him balance, The Ball's was built into his head so that he could roll at the same time without having to hold anything, Mr Mike was given his simply as a phone, as no one could be bothered to try and explain it in a way in which a retarded person would understand. Other than that there was a loudspeaker in each room that could be used to announce something to everyone, these were all in the shape of large cable ties. The message today from 62 fingered man was that something very odd had happened with Poo Cake Woman.
Having relocated from the comfort of his bed to the control room, Bean Boy was having it explained to him that the 62 fingered man had been looking at Poo Cake Woman's location when she had stopped in one place for a minute or so, and then suddenly been moved very quickly to Thirsty Land either underground or above ground as she seemed to go straight through buildings. Bean Boy asked 62 fingered man if he could keep him updated on Poo Cake Woman's location, and just before he exited the room, the 62 fingered man informed Bean Boy that Mr Mike's beepamathon was not appearing on his screen, Bean Boy was more concerned about Poo Cake Woman and quickly left the room and, whilst making his way to check on Bean Cake Kid, he heard the 62 fingered man's voice over the cable tie telling everyone to get prepared for the rescue.
Mr Mike was finding it difficult to talk to this strange character. He asked him what his name was and the man replied with "Man Backwards the am I. Name your is what?” Rather than telling him what his name was, Mr Mike took of his hat, which he was wearing backwards, and showed the Backwards Man the front of his hat which had "Mr Mike" printed on it. The man shook his head, which Mr Mike took to have the same meaning as a normal person nodding their head, and then said "Here you are why?" to which Mr Mike shrugged. Walking around the strange shop, Mr Mike saw that the man wasn't the only thing that was backwards. He then decided to take a look outside and found that when he went outside he didn't get wet at all as the floor was blocking the rain. He turned round towards the shop to see the man following him and the theme of things being backwards was continued by the shop that had a sign saying "Pohs" above it. Looking round to see it there was anything else to see in this strange world, Mr Mike thought he saw another building standing on a ledge a short distance away.
Bean Boy was quite happily sitting on his bed, when 62 fingered man called him using the intercom system that had been made by Lame Name Eric. He had thought it would be funny to make it in the shape of a hole punch, so that when people were using it, they could say "I'm giving you a punch" if they wanted to talk to you. They had all been given different objects to act as intercoms. Poo Cake Woman was given a plastic banana, The Bored Guy an unsolved rubix cube, Fred got a post it note book made out of cat food, so that he didn’t eat it, the Lonely Bear a stuffed pigeon, MM got a bit of wood, Hopigan’s was just an ordinary pair of headphones, so he could place them on his head rather than having to hold something as he needed both of his arms to help him balance, The Ball's was built into his head so that he could roll at the same time without having to hold anything, Mr Mike was given his simply as a phone, as no one could be bothered to try and explain it in a way in which a retarded person would understand. Other than that there was a loudspeaker in each room that could be used to announce something to everyone, these were all in the shape of large cable ties. The message today from 62 fingered man was that something very odd had happened with Poo Cake Woman.
Having relocated from the comfort of his bed to the control room, Bean Boy was having it explained to him that the 62 fingered man had been looking at Poo Cake Woman's location when she had stopped in one place for a minute or so, and then suddenly been moved very quickly to Thirsty Land either underground or above ground as she seemed to go straight through buildings. Bean Boy asked 62 fingered man if he could keep him updated on Poo Cake Woman's location, and just before he exited the room, the 62 fingered man informed Bean Boy that Mr Mike's beepamathon was not appearing on his screen, Bean Boy was more concerned about Poo Cake Woman and quickly left the room and, whilst making his way to check on Bean Cake Kid, he heard the 62 fingered man's voice over the cable tie telling everyone to get prepared for the rescue.
Mr Mike was finding it difficult to talk to this strange character. He asked him what his name was and the man replied with "Man Backwards the am I. Name your is what?” Rather than telling him what his name was, Mr Mike took of his hat, which he was wearing backwards, and showed the Backwards Man the front of his hat which had "Mr Mike" printed on it. The man shook his head, which Mr Mike took to have the same meaning as a normal person nodding their head, and then said "Here you are why?" to which Mr Mike shrugged. Walking around the strange shop, Mr Mike saw that the man wasn't the only thing that was backwards. He then decided to take a look outside and found that when he went outside he didn't get wet at all as the floor was blocking the rain. He turned round towards the shop to see the man following him and the theme of things being backwards was continued by the shop that had a sign saying "Pohs" above it. Looking round to see it there was anything else to see in this strange world, Mr Mike thought he saw another building standing on a ledge a short distance away.
3.1 backwards cat
3.1
Following the collision, The Ball emerged out of the bag that he was in to see Bean Cake Kid sprawled on the floor a short distance away with a thin black bike tire line down the middle of his body. He saw that there was no sign of a meercat or a penny farthing, and quickly made a call to headquarters to inform someone of what had happened and to get some help. A few short minutes later Poo Cake Woman and Bean Boy were huddled around their creation as Fred was sniffing around for smells that might act as a clue and the Lonely Bear was asking around the small group of people that had gathered if any of them had seen what happened, but none of them were getting any new information.
Mr Mike looked around for the source of the voice and saw a figure lurking in the shadow of the wall with the road painting on it. Mr Mike started walking towards the wall and as he did so, the stranger turned round and walked awkwardly away from Mr Mike. He continued to follow the strange looking being for what must have been a good 10 minutes walking when he saw several more very unusual things and thought to himself “Nothing in this place is making much sense”. Even for someone who is retarded.
Despite having been hit by a penny farthing, Bean Cake Kid was up and wanting to go after his attacker 10 minutes later. Both Poo Cake Woman and Bean Boy would not allow him to and as Poo Cake Woman had some of her trusty boomerangs on her, Bean Boy agreed that it was better if she went after the source of the accident. She activated her beepamathon, so that the others would know where she was and set off, rolling along on top of her large salt and vinegar pringles tube. Luckily she had thought to pick up the right supplies before she came from the base.
As he was trying to keep up with the unknown individual, and didn’t quite understand, Mr Mike didn’t have time to prepare anything that would stop him getting soaked. He walked into what could only be described as rain that was falling upwards, following the weird being, who was a different kind of weird compared to what Mr Mike was used to. The person, if they could be called a person, stepped into something resembling a lift and Mr Mike jumped in just as the door closed.
When they arrived back at the base, Bean Boy and his successor went straight to the control room to talk to 62 fingered man. They informed him of what had happened and before they could even see any movement, he had tapped the keyboard to find out where Poo Cake Woman was.
Having lost sight of the penny farthing tracks, she stopped to catch her breath as she had just gone up a hill. She was looking around for any sign of a penny farthing when she thought she glimpsed a head quickly duck down behind the see saw in the play area of the park. She grabbed one of her boomerangs and launched it before the head popped up again and quickly began making her way to the park entrance, which was quick as it was downhill. She used the momentum to carry her swiftly across to the play area, and there lying behind the see saw was a meercat, a boomerang and, looking around, Poo Cake Woman spotted the penny farthing behind a tree.
Emerging out of the lift, Mr Mike appeared to be in a shop. He thought it looked like a pretty normal shop, but, now Mr Mike saw him properly, the man he had followed didn’t look normal at all. His eyes were white in the centre and blue around the edges, his eyebrows, lips, nose and ears were upside down and his whole head seemed to be on his neck backwards. Mr Mike realised this was probably why it looked like he was walking awkwardly.
Several hours later, Poo Cake Woman awoke with a headache and the vague memory of hearing a noise behind her and seeing a glimpse of an angry looking badger. She opened her eyes and appeared sitting on a large model of a plane in an otherwise empty room. Looking around she saw neither the meercat, the penny farthing and, more importantly, her boomerangs and other supplies were gone as well. Becoming slightly worried, Poo Cake Woman checked her beepamathon and was happy to see that it was still working. She then realised that the plane she was sitting on was fluorescent green and had random feet painted onto it.
Following the collision, The Ball emerged out of the bag that he was in to see Bean Cake Kid sprawled on the floor a short distance away with a thin black bike tire line down the middle of his body. He saw that there was no sign of a meercat or a penny farthing, and quickly made a call to headquarters to inform someone of what had happened and to get some help. A few short minutes later Poo Cake Woman and Bean Boy were huddled around their creation as Fred was sniffing around for smells that might act as a clue and the Lonely Bear was asking around the small group of people that had gathered if any of them had seen what happened, but none of them were getting any new information.
Mr Mike looked around for the source of the voice and saw a figure lurking in the shadow of the wall with the road painting on it. Mr Mike started walking towards the wall and as he did so, the stranger turned round and walked awkwardly away from Mr Mike. He continued to follow the strange looking being for what must have been a good 10 minutes walking when he saw several more very unusual things and thought to himself “Nothing in this place is making much sense”. Even for someone who is retarded.
Despite having been hit by a penny farthing, Bean Cake Kid was up and wanting to go after his attacker 10 minutes later. Both Poo Cake Woman and Bean Boy would not allow him to and as Poo Cake Woman had some of her trusty boomerangs on her, Bean Boy agreed that it was better if she went after the source of the accident. She activated her beepamathon, so that the others would know where she was and set off, rolling along on top of her large salt and vinegar pringles tube. Luckily she had thought to pick up the right supplies before she came from the base.
As he was trying to keep up with the unknown individual, and didn’t quite understand, Mr Mike didn’t have time to prepare anything that would stop him getting soaked. He walked into what could only be described as rain that was falling upwards, following the weird being, who was a different kind of weird compared to what Mr Mike was used to. The person, if they could be called a person, stepped into something resembling a lift and Mr Mike jumped in just as the door closed.
When they arrived back at the base, Bean Boy and his successor went straight to the control room to talk to 62 fingered man. They informed him of what had happened and before they could even see any movement, he had tapped the keyboard to find out where Poo Cake Woman was.
Having lost sight of the penny farthing tracks, she stopped to catch her breath as she had just gone up a hill. She was looking around for any sign of a penny farthing when she thought she glimpsed a head quickly duck down behind the see saw in the play area of the park. She grabbed one of her boomerangs and launched it before the head popped up again and quickly began making her way to the park entrance, which was quick as it was downhill. She used the momentum to carry her swiftly across to the play area, and there lying behind the see saw was a meercat, a boomerang and, looking around, Poo Cake Woman spotted the penny farthing behind a tree.
Emerging out of the lift, Mr Mike appeared to be in a shop. He thought it looked like a pretty normal shop, but, now Mr Mike saw him properly, the man he had followed didn’t look normal at all. His eyes were white in the centre and blue around the edges, his eyebrows, lips, nose and ears were upside down and his whole head seemed to be on his neck backwards. Mr Mike realised this was probably why it looked like he was walking awkwardly.
Several hours later, Poo Cake Woman awoke with a headache and the vague memory of hearing a noise behind her and seeing a glimpse of an angry looking badger. She opened her eyes and appeared sitting on a large model of a plane in an otherwise empty room. Looking around she saw neither the meercat, the penny farthing and, more importantly, her boomerangs and other supplies were gone as well. Becoming slightly worried, Poo Cake Woman checked her beepamathon and was happy to see that it was still working. She then realised that the plane she was sitting on was fluorescent green and had random feet painted onto it.
3.0 backwards cat
3.0
Whilst walking through a deserted town that had been vandalised and covered in graffiti after it had been a victim of a riot, Mr Mike sensed that someone was following him watching everything that he was doing. He continued on his way, but was becoming more and more wary of someone coming closer and closer to him. Having thought for 10 minutes about how he could lose his follower, Mr Mike turned many seemingly random corners whilst all the time knowing where they were leading to, he turned round the last corner but saw that there were people ahead, so stopped to lean on the window of a bank so he could think about what he should do next.
In their now high tech base, Bean Cake Kid was playing a game with the other younger members of the newly found training program when Bean Boy called him over to ask a favour. It was explained to Bean Cake Kid that one of their friends was having second thoughts about something important and that, whilst this information couldn’t be shared with him, he could make a use of himself by transporting The Ball round to this person’s house as The Ball was to talk to him about it. Not being allowed to know the exact details about what was happening, Bean Cake Kid had put The Ball in a bag on his back and set off speeding along on his bike. He came to a particularly busy road and went to cross it, but what he didn’t see coming along the road was a meercat on a penny farthing.
Mr Mike had no idea where he was or how he had got there but he thought “At least I’m no longer being followed”. He appeared to be on the other side of the bank window, but it was no longer a bank. Instead it seemed to be just a glass window with nothing on the other side, and plenty of weird sights on the side that he was on. The first thing he noticed was something that looked like a giant hammer. He tried to walk towards it, but as he wasn’t standing on anything particular, he didn’t see how he could achieve this. He found, however, that something that felt like a combination of swimming and flying moved him where he wanted to go. As he moved towards the hammer, it started to swing through the air. He shifted his gaze towards where he thought it was swinging and saw a giant nail, on the same scale as the giant hammer. He followed the nail until its sharp tip and felt sorry for the man whose back it was heading for. Hearing a sludgy squirting sound Mr Mike looked around for the source of the noise. Seeing a hand holding the giant hammer he did a swimming action towards it and discovered that the person, if it could be called a person, had a large torso, small legs and a square head. On top of which was a regular size person holding a toothpaste tube that was the same size as him. He was using this as a gun to shoot someone who was sitting at a computer quite a distance away. Just above the shooters head, Mr Mike saw another odd sight. A toothbrush was hovering there. He was just wondering why the toothbrush was there when a TV landed on it, stopping it from landing on the shooters head. It appeared that someone didn’t like the shooter, and had thrown a TV at him, just to have his plan thwarted by a floating toothbrush. Mr Mike was astonished to see that the person who had thrown the TV was being strangled by having a noose round their neck being used as a lead. The other end of the noose was being held by someone who Mr Mike thought that he recognised. He made his way towards what he thought was The Bored Guy, but as he got closer noticed several distinct differences. Rather than having “Bored” on his hat, the word “Fuck” was there instead and he was bleeding from his eyelid. After being confused about this for a few seconds, Mr Mike noticed what appeared to be thought bubbles coming away from the noose holders head. He followed the thought bubbles until they stopped. And saw that the words “nothing .. empty space” featured in the final one. He took out one of his spanners, and threw it at the man. Being mildly retarded meant that the spanner missed its target completely and, not wanting to waste any more spanners, Mr Mike looked around and thought that he would follow the steadily dripping blood. After a few minutes of floating downwards, he saw a small umbrella and realised that it was being held by a small man, who had the appearance of a hamster running around in his wheel, as he was on what appeared to be an upside down unicycle. Following the upside down unicycle, Mr Mike found that there was a man riding the unicycle upside down whilst doing a handstand on a tall thin wall that had a road painted on to one of its sides. Mr Mike looked away from the wall just in time to see a figure run head first into the wall and stop dead in his tracks with his head on the wall rather than falling over. He then proceeded to drop many sharp objects, including knives and saws, upon the group of little people that were gathered below him. At this point, Mr Mike realised he was back where he began and saw the nail moving steadily closer to the poor man with his head against the wall, just as a mysterious voice said “Here doing you are what?”.
Whilst walking through a deserted town that had been vandalised and covered in graffiti after it had been a victim of a riot, Mr Mike sensed that someone was following him watching everything that he was doing. He continued on his way, but was becoming more and more wary of someone coming closer and closer to him. Having thought for 10 minutes about how he could lose his follower, Mr Mike turned many seemingly random corners whilst all the time knowing where they were leading to, he turned round the last corner but saw that there were people ahead, so stopped to lean on the window of a bank so he could think about what he should do next.
In their now high tech base, Bean Cake Kid was playing a game with the other younger members of the newly found training program when Bean Boy called him over to ask a favour. It was explained to Bean Cake Kid that one of their friends was having second thoughts about something important and that, whilst this information couldn’t be shared with him, he could make a use of himself by transporting The Ball round to this person’s house as The Ball was to talk to him about it. Not being allowed to know the exact details about what was happening, Bean Cake Kid had put The Ball in a bag on his back and set off speeding along on his bike. He came to a particularly busy road and went to cross it, but what he didn’t see coming along the road was a meercat on a penny farthing.
Mr Mike had no idea where he was or how he had got there but he thought “At least I’m no longer being followed”. He appeared to be on the other side of the bank window, but it was no longer a bank. Instead it seemed to be just a glass window with nothing on the other side, and plenty of weird sights on the side that he was on. The first thing he noticed was something that looked like a giant hammer. He tried to walk towards it, but as he wasn’t standing on anything particular, he didn’t see how he could achieve this. He found, however, that something that felt like a combination of swimming and flying moved him where he wanted to go. As he moved towards the hammer, it started to swing through the air. He shifted his gaze towards where he thought it was swinging and saw a giant nail, on the same scale as the giant hammer. He followed the nail until its sharp tip and felt sorry for the man whose back it was heading for. Hearing a sludgy squirting sound Mr Mike looked around for the source of the noise. Seeing a hand holding the giant hammer he did a swimming action towards it and discovered that the person, if it could be called a person, had a large torso, small legs and a square head. On top of which was a regular size person holding a toothpaste tube that was the same size as him. He was using this as a gun to shoot someone who was sitting at a computer quite a distance away. Just above the shooters head, Mr Mike saw another odd sight. A toothbrush was hovering there. He was just wondering why the toothbrush was there when a TV landed on it, stopping it from landing on the shooters head. It appeared that someone didn’t like the shooter, and had thrown a TV at him, just to have his plan thwarted by a floating toothbrush. Mr Mike was astonished to see that the person who had thrown the TV was being strangled by having a noose round their neck being used as a lead. The other end of the noose was being held by someone who Mr Mike thought that he recognised. He made his way towards what he thought was The Bored Guy, but as he got closer noticed several distinct differences. Rather than having “Bored” on his hat, the word “Fuck” was there instead and he was bleeding from his eyelid. After being confused about this for a few seconds, Mr Mike noticed what appeared to be thought bubbles coming away from the noose holders head. He followed the thought bubbles until they stopped. And saw that the words “nothing .. empty space” featured in the final one. He took out one of his spanners, and threw it at the man. Being mildly retarded meant that the spanner missed its target completely and, not wanting to waste any more spanners, Mr Mike looked around and thought that he would follow the steadily dripping blood. After a few minutes of floating downwards, he saw a small umbrella and realised that it was being held by a small man, who had the appearance of a hamster running around in his wheel, as he was on what appeared to be an upside down unicycle. Following the upside down unicycle, Mr Mike found that there was a man riding the unicycle upside down whilst doing a handstand on a tall thin wall that had a road painted on to one of its sides. Mr Mike looked away from the wall just in time to see a figure run head first into the wall and stop dead in his tracks with his head on the wall rather than falling over. He then proceeded to drop many sharp objects, including knives and saws, upon the group of little people that were gathered below him. At this point, Mr Mike realised he was back where he began and saw the nail moving steadily closer to the poor man with his head against the wall, just as a mysterious voice said “Here doing you are what?”.
2. hop mole music
2.
In their new headquarters, Bean Boy and Poo Cake Woman could be found in the same positions they had been in previously, Bean Boy sitting on the bed being lazy and Poo Cake Woman busily organising files on her computer.
Bean Boy was distracted from his sleepy state of lazyness by Poo Cake Woman ssshing Boris, who was Poo Cake Woman’s temporary device for staying up to date with what could or could not be happening.
As they had only recently acquired these new premises for their headquarters the walls were bare and they did not have use of their usual equipment yet. Whilst there was nothing wrong with their old base, the move was necessary as they had taken on a few new beings that would help them in their jobs and there simply hadn’t been enough space.
Once completed, it would be a lot easier for the team to have easy access to all of their usual facilities. Bean Boy jumped as his mobile phone went off with a message from their most recent addition to their squad.
As Poo Cake Woman was still busy on her computer, Bean Boy didn’t bother interrupting her as he ambled out of the door before making his way downstairs.
He walked into the room and said “Hey Hoppy”. Several seconds later, Bean Boy found himself having to dodge the many items that were being thrown in his direction, followed by “Shut up and look at this”.
10 minutes later Bean Boy yelled “You might want to stop dancing now” over the sound of Poo Cake Woman’s music. She turned round to face Bean Boy and, after seeing his expression, quickly crossed the room and stopped the music. Without giving her a chance to ask what was wrong, Bean Boy determinedly said “It’s The Ball, we need to go, right now”. Poo Cake Woman turned her computer off instantly and said “I’m ready” before Bean Boy had even passed through the yet to be filled door frame.
As there were only 8 seats in their new vehicle, Lame Name Eric volunteered to stay behind and keep them informed about what was happening.
As they were speeding along in MM’s car, Poo Cake Woman turned towards Hopigan and asked “So whats going on? And what are we doing about it?”. This caught the attention of all the others and all but MM swivelled their chairs round as Hopigan began to explain.
“As you all know, The Ball was trying to secretly try and gather information about our longest living enemy. However earlier I received a partly garbled message from The Ball himself, I think, saying that he may have been found out”.
Approaching a split in the road, MM asked “Do you have any suggestions as to where our melon sized friend is?”.
A short distance away, in The Forest of Moles, a group of about 20 small ears were scattered around a distinctly larger ear. A voice as if from nowhere suddenly filled the area they were in. “Did it work?”. A much quieter, squeakier voice replied with “They are on their way right now, in what looks like just a normal car”.
Having gone as far as possible by car, Bean Boy, Poo Cake Woman, Lonely Bear, The Bored Guy, Fred and Hopigan left MM’s car and made their way forward by walking, or in Hopigan’s case, hopping.
They continued on for what must have been a mile at least, and suddenly they were all caught up in a giant net. Dangling in their netty prison, as several small ears and a giant ear gathered on the ground beneath them, the unusual heroes all started shouting in surprise and annoyance. Poo Cake Woman could even be heard saying “Oh poo cakes!”
Hearing the loud protests from the group, and thinking that it couldn’t be a good thing, MM immediately started looking for a way to get closer to see what was happening.
The mysterious voice once again filled the area. “Not so tough now are you? Now that you’re all stuck up there, with no one to save you”.
Another, more familiar voice, now filled the area. “So, you think I’m just going to let you get away with killing my friends?”. The big ear turned to one of the smaller ears and, whilst pointing up at the net, angrily asked “I thought you said that was all of them!?”. His small counterpart replied “But that’s just a human person, he cant do anything”.
The one in charge turned once again, this time to face MM. “You cant stop us, puny human, we are much more powerful than you could imagine”.
From the inside of his car, MM laughed to himself at this comment and then said “That is a good point I suppose, I better be off then, but before I go, I just have to do one thing”. 10 seconds later, the deafening sound of music was coming from the enormous speakers that were in the back of his car. Straight away all of the ears had started screeching and some of them even fainting, but MM turned over towards the volume control and turned it up as loud as it would go. The resulting racket was too much for the ears and they all collapsed onto the floor and that was the end of them.
The best thing about all of the ears dying, was that The Ball was now freed from his waxy confinement. The entire team cheered as he reappeared, and he assisted MM in letting them down from their trap.
On their way back, they all asked MM how he had known that all of the ears would die if loud music was blared out at them and he said that he just had a hunch that, as they were giant ears, they would have a heightened sense of hearing and this could be used to kill them if there was some loud noise around them.
All that was left to do now was to concentrate on getting their new headquarters up to date, as there were bound to be many more enemies for them to dispose of.
In their new headquarters, Bean Boy and Poo Cake Woman could be found in the same positions they had been in previously, Bean Boy sitting on the bed being lazy and Poo Cake Woman busily organising files on her computer.
Bean Boy was distracted from his sleepy state of lazyness by Poo Cake Woman ssshing Boris, who was Poo Cake Woman’s temporary device for staying up to date with what could or could not be happening.
As they had only recently acquired these new premises for their headquarters the walls were bare and they did not have use of their usual equipment yet. Whilst there was nothing wrong with their old base, the move was necessary as they had taken on a few new beings that would help them in their jobs and there simply hadn’t been enough space.
Once completed, it would be a lot easier for the team to have easy access to all of their usual facilities. Bean Boy jumped as his mobile phone went off with a message from their most recent addition to their squad.
As Poo Cake Woman was still busy on her computer, Bean Boy didn’t bother interrupting her as he ambled out of the door before making his way downstairs.
He walked into the room and said “Hey Hoppy”. Several seconds later, Bean Boy found himself having to dodge the many items that were being thrown in his direction, followed by “Shut up and look at this”.
10 minutes later Bean Boy yelled “You might want to stop dancing now” over the sound of Poo Cake Woman’s music. She turned round to face Bean Boy and, after seeing his expression, quickly crossed the room and stopped the music. Without giving her a chance to ask what was wrong, Bean Boy determinedly said “It’s The Ball, we need to go, right now”. Poo Cake Woman turned her computer off instantly and said “I’m ready” before Bean Boy had even passed through the yet to be filled door frame.
As there were only 8 seats in their new vehicle, Lame Name Eric volunteered to stay behind and keep them informed about what was happening.
As they were speeding along in MM’s car, Poo Cake Woman turned towards Hopigan and asked “So whats going on? And what are we doing about it?”. This caught the attention of all the others and all but MM swivelled their chairs round as Hopigan began to explain.
“As you all know, The Ball was trying to secretly try and gather information about our longest living enemy. However earlier I received a partly garbled message from The Ball himself, I think, saying that he may have been found out”.
Approaching a split in the road, MM asked “Do you have any suggestions as to where our melon sized friend is?”.
A short distance away, in The Forest of Moles, a group of about 20 small ears were scattered around a distinctly larger ear. A voice as if from nowhere suddenly filled the area they were in. “Did it work?”. A much quieter, squeakier voice replied with “They are on their way right now, in what looks like just a normal car”.
Having gone as far as possible by car, Bean Boy, Poo Cake Woman, Lonely Bear, The Bored Guy, Fred and Hopigan left MM’s car and made their way forward by walking, or in Hopigan’s case, hopping.
They continued on for what must have been a mile at least, and suddenly they were all caught up in a giant net. Dangling in their netty prison, as several small ears and a giant ear gathered on the ground beneath them, the unusual heroes all started shouting in surprise and annoyance. Poo Cake Woman could even be heard saying “Oh poo cakes!”
Hearing the loud protests from the group, and thinking that it couldn’t be a good thing, MM immediately started looking for a way to get closer to see what was happening.
The mysterious voice once again filled the area. “Not so tough now are you? Now that you’re all stuck up there, with no one to save you”.
Another, more familiar voice, now filled the area. “So, you think I’m just going to let you get away with killing my friends?”. The big ear turned to one of the smaller ears and, whilst pointing up at the net, angrily asked “I thought you said that was all of them!?”. His small counterpart replied “But that’s just a human person, he cant do anything”.
The one in charge turned once again, this time to face MM. “You cant stop us, puny human, we are much more powerful than you could imagine”.
From the inside of his car, MM laughed to himself at this comment and then said “That is a good point I suppose, I better be off then, but before I go, I just have to do one thing”. 10 seconds later, the deafening sound of music was coming from the enormous speakers that were in the back of his car. Straight away all of the ears had started screeching and some of them even fainting, but MM turned over towards the volume control and turned it up as loud as it would go. The resulting racket was too much for the ears and they all collapsed onto the floor and that was the end of them.
The best thing about all of the ears dying, was that The Ball was now freed from his waxy confinement. The entire team cheered as he reappeared, and he assisted MM in letting them down from their trap.
On their way back, they all asked MM how he had known that all of the ears would die if loud music was blared out at them and he said that he just had a hunch that, as they were giant ears, they would have a heightened sense of hearing and this could be used to kill them if there was some loud noise around them.
All that was left to do now was to concentrate on getting their new headquarters up to date, as there were bound to be many more enemies for them to dispose of.
1. crazy tree dog
1.
Poo Cake Woman sits in her chair busily organising her desk and speedily typing when she looks up at the empty space where the strange upside down fish was for a week. She turns to her messy bed where Bean Boy, Fred, and the Lonely Bear were and cutely says “I want the fish back”.
The evil scheming Bean Boy says “Do your mission impossible acting and go steal it”
Poo Cake Woman does shifty eye movements and hums the mission impossible tune whilst holding her hands next to her face in a gun shape. At this point, clumsy Poo Cake Woman falls off her chair. Bean Boy, the Lonely Bear and Fred laugh at Poo Cake Woman as she picks herself up off the floor.
Eventually the laughing dies down and an alarm that sounds like a woppy noise makes them all jump. The Lonely Bear leaps off the bed, sprints across the room and turns the corner with the others following him.
Due to him being unfit, Bean Boy arrived in the secret room last. Eric the phantom, nicknamed “lame name Eric”, sighed with disappointment as Bean Boy slumped into a custom made chair.
Lame name Eric then continued with his description of their current threat. A crazy man who lived in Wales and liked experimenting on his dog had been stealing exhaust pipes from innocent people’s cars.
Bean Boy was particularly shocked and realised the seriousness behind this as he himself had needed a new exhaust for his bean mobile that very day and knew how much they cost. They all got prepared for what they were about to do – Poo Cake Woman got a fresh supply of boomerangs, Bean Boy put on his gadget shoes, Fred ate several energy bones and the Lonely Bear picked up his various weapons – and made their way to their own vehicles.
On their way to Wales, the group were informed by lame name Eric that the situation had gotten worse since they last talked.
He explained that the crazed individual had now kidnapped a load of sheep, was flying around on a rocketdog with all the sheep dangling below the rocketdog and had apparently called himself Crazy Sheep Man.
As the Crazy Sheep Man could fly, Bean Boy thought that it had been a good idea to put on his gadget shoes and, via the radio in his car, asked lame name Eric where this Crazy Sheep Man had last been seen.
The reply that he had been sighted next to a large multicoloured tree was no help to the team of unusual individuals as there were a lot of trees in Wales.
However as they were leaving England and travelling across a bridge into Wales a large red tree landed in front of them which meant they had to take immediate action to move out of its way.
As none of them heroes had cars that could fly, they would soon have to call for backup from their good friend.
Before this could be done the sheep hanging from the rocketdog had to be cut down and saved. This was a job for Poo Cake Woman, Bean Boy and Fred.
Poo Cake Woman used her supply of boomerangs to easily slice through the rope that was holding the sheep as Bean Boy used his gadget shoes to jump up and catch the falling sheep and, after having eaten some energy bones, Fred was able to jump really high and also catch some sheep.
Meanwhile, the Lonely Bear was filling in the 6th member of the team.
As he was doing this, Poo Cake Woman saw the Crazy Sheep Man flying his rocketdog towards the Lonely Bear. She shouted to Bean Boy and Fred to try and stop him but when they were unsuccessful and the bean mobile was destroyed and Bean Boy injured, she exclaimed “Oh poo cakes!”.
Worried about having been cut off suddenly from his fellow team member, their saviour was pushing his flying car to its fastest in order to prevent any more of them being injured.
Just as he was feeling particularly pleased with the damage he had caused so far, Crazy Sheep Man was annoyed by the famous flying car which he knew had been the downfall of other evil people.
Immediately he ordered his rocketdog to fly away, but the flying car was too quick. It was now accompanied by the other members of the team who were each holding one of the Lonely Bear’s weapons.
Crazy Sheep Man was especially scared at this point and, despite the agile rocket dog, was shot down by the heroes and as he fell to his death, saw a peculiar face appear in the sky after the flying car drew it there.
Poo Cake Woman sits in her chair busily organising her desk and speedily typing when she looks up at the empty space where the strange upside down fish was for a week. She turns to her messy bed where Bean Boy, Fred, and the Lonely Bear were and cutely says “I want the fish back”.
The evil scheming Bean Boy says “Do your mission impossible acting and go steal it”
Poo Cake Woman does shifty eye movements and hums the mission impossible tune whilst holding her hands next to her face in a gun shape. At this point, clumsy Poo Cake Woman falls off her chair. Bean Boy, the Lonely Bear and Fred laugh at Poo Cake Woman as she picks herself up off the floor.
Eventually the laughing dies down and an alarm that sounds like a woppy noise makes them all jump. The Lonely Bear leaps off the bed, sprints across the room and turns the corner with the others following him.
Due to him being unfit, Bean Boy arrived in the secret room last. Eric the phantom, nicknamed “lame name Eric”, sighed with disappointment as Bean Boy slumped into a custom made chair.
Lame name Eric then continued with his description of their current threat. A crazy man who lived in Wales and liked experimenting on his dog had been stealing exhaust pipes from innocent people’s cars.
Bean Boy was particularly shocked and realised the seriousness behind this as he himself had needed a new exhaust for his bean mobile that very day and knew how much they cost. They all got prepared for what they were about to do – Poo Cake Woman got a fresh supply of boomerangs, Bean Boy put on his gadget shoes, Fred ate several energy bones and the Lonely Bear picked up his various weapons – and made their way to their own vehicles.
On their way to Wales, the group were informed by lame name Eric that the situation had gotten worse since they last talked.
He explained that the crazed individual had now kidnapped a load of sheep, was flying around on a rocketdog with all the sheep dangling below the rocketdog and had apparently called himself Crazy Sheep Man.
As the Crazy Sheep Man could fly, Bean Boy thought that it had been a good idea to put on his gadget shoes and, via the radio in his car, asked lame name Eric where this Crazy Sheep Man had last been seen.
The reply that he had been sighted next to a large multicoloured tree was no help to the team of unusual individuals as there were a lot of trees in Wales.
However as they were leaving England and travelling across a bridge into Wales a large red tree landed in front of them which meant they had to take immediate action to move out of its way.
As none of them heroes had cars that could fly, they would soon have to call for backup from their good friend.
Before this could be done the sheep hanging from the rocketdog had to be cut down and saved. This was a job for Poo Cake Woman, Bean Boy and Fred.
Poo Cake Woman used her supply of boomerangs to easily slice through the rope that was holding the sheep as Bean Boy used his gadget shoes to jump up and catch the falling sheep and, after having eaten some energy bones, Fred was able to jump really high and also catch some sheep.
Meanwhile, the Lonely Bear was filling in the 6th member of the team.
As he was doing this, Poo Cake Woman saw the Crazy Sheep Man flying his rocketdog towards the Lonely Bear. She shouted to Bean Boy and Fred to try and stop him but when they were unsuccessful and the bean mobile was destroyed and Bean Boy injured, she exclaimed “Oh poo cakes!”.
Worried about having been cut off suddenly from his fellow team member, their saviour was pushing his flying car to its fastest in order to prevent any more of them being injured.
Just as he was feeling particularly pleased with the damage he had caused so far, Crazy Sheep Man was annoyed by the famous flying car which he knew had been the downfall of other evil people.
Immediately he ordered his rocketdog to fly away, but the flying car was too quick. It was now accompanied by the other members of the team who were each holding one of the Lonely Bear’s weapons.
Crazy Sheep Man was especially scared at this point and, despite the agile rocket dog, was shot down by the heroes and as he fell to his death, saw a peculiar face appear in the sky after the flying car drew it there.
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